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  • Home
  • News
    • Cremation
    • Green Funerals
    • Grief & Loss
    • Funeral Industry Press Releases
  • Lighter Side
  • Marketing
    • Social Media
    • Customer Service
  • Jobs
  • About Us
    • Advertise With Us
    • Contact Us
    • Speaking
    • Social Media Marketing for Funeral Homes
    • Privacy Policy
  • The Daily Hearse
  • Home
  • News
    • Cremation
    • Green Funerals
    • Grief & Loss
    • Funeral Industry Press Releases
  • Lighter Side
  • Marketing
    • Social Media
    • Customer Service
  • Jobs
  • About Us
    • Advertise With Us
    • Contact Us
    • Speaking
    • Social Media Marketing for Funeral Homes
    • Privacy Policy
  • The Daily Hearse

Eli Gable

Eli Gable

Director Says “Let’s Circle Back,” Accidentally Condemns Staff to Endless Meeting | FFFW 272

March 13, 2026 ENJOY Friday Funeral Fast Wrap Funeral Industry News 0 Comments

Can you feel that? It's the sweet sensation of the weekend approaching. Let's never forget -- the weekend is AWESOME, and that means Fridays are amazing. We've been...

Eli Gable

America Still Unable to Define What Counts as Funeral Attire | FFFW 271

March 6, 2026 ENJOY Friday Funeral Fast Wrap Funeral Industry News 0 Comments

Welcome to March! March is the middle child of the year. It’s often ignored when viewing the whole month family. It seems low profile and subtle. But much...

Eli Gable

Director Says He’s “Tapped Into Youth Culture” After Saying “6-7” Twice | FFFW 270

February 27, 2026 ENJOY Friday Funeral Fast Wrap Funeral Industry News 0 Comments

Hey y’all! Welcome back to the FFFW, where we give you a weekly dose of funeral fun, satire, and some occasional otter gifs. Let’s go! New monthly newsletter!...

Eli Gable

Funeral Home Adds “Olympic Podium” to Lobby for “Employee Recognition” | FFFW 269

February 20, 2026 ENJOY Friday Funeral Fast Wrap Funeral Industry News 0 Comments

Happy Friday, y’all! There are just a couple of days left of the Winter Olympics. And if you’re like me, you’re hooked. I’ve been looking into curling clubs,...

Eli Gable

Funeral Home Uses Luge System for Body Transport | FFFW 268

February 13, 2026 ENJOY Funeral Industry News 0 Comments

It’s Friday, baby. The phones are ringing, the coffee is doing its ministry, and somewhere a stapler is missing for the third time today. Welcome back to the...

Eli Gable

Hack-Proof System Announced; Password Now Meets Requirements and Still Gets Written on a Post-It | FFFW 267

February 6, 2026 ENJOY Friday Funeral Fast Wrap Funeral Industry News 0 Comments

Welcome to February! Can you believe we're already into month 2 of 2026? I can already tell this year is going to fly by. And we want to...

Eli Gable

Director Claims He’s “Embracing Change”; Switches From Blue Pens to Black Pens | FFFW 266

January 30, 2026 ENJOY Friday Funeral Fast Wrap Funeral Industry News 0 Comments

Welp, we survived the first month of 2026. For some of us it meant our homes lost electric and our cars skated on ice. But -- if you’re...

Eli Gable

“We’re Going Paperless,” Owner Says While Printing the Email About Going Paperless | FFFW 265

January 16, 2026 ENJOY Friday Funeral Fast Wrap Funeral Industry News 0 Comments

Happy Friday! We are halfway through January and I'm feeling great about it. The daylight is getting a little longer, and we're between seasonal warmth and cold snaps...

Eli Gable

Fatal Typing Error Causes Disaster | FFFW 264

January 9, 2026 ENJOY Friday Funeral Fast Wrap Funeral Industry News 0 Comments

Hey guys! It feels like it’s been 1000 days since Christmas, right? How does that work? Time is a wild thing. And speaking of time- I don’t want...

Eli Gable

Owner Buys New Scheduling Software; Staff Continues Using the Same Sticky Note | FFFW 263

January 2, 2026 ENJOY Friday Funeral Fast Wrap Funeral Industry News 0 Comments

We made it to our first issue of 2026! This is now our 6th calendar year of writing this silly funeral satire article week after week. But, I’m...

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