Oh no! Look at the calendar… it’s Friday the 13th! So watch for the cracks in the sidewalks, don’t stand under any ladders, and keep an eye out for serial killers. But even if it’s the 13th, we’re not gonna let that stop us from enjoying the best day of the week. So sit back, enjoy the GIFs, and let’s kick off the weekend!

Defend Yourself

Aggressive competitors are everywhere and they want your market share. Parting Pro has helped successfully launch new, low-cost cremation brands in a variety of markets.

Defend yourself and protect your market share with Parting Pro!

Don’t Let “Big Loafer” Fool You?

Normally I only report humorous and light-hearted content inside of the FFFW. But, when you come across something so angering as what I’ve found, you have to do all you can to expose it. So, please read all I have written with the utmost seriousness and understand the larger implications this has on us as a whole.

Ask yourself this question, do you as a funeral professional dress the exact same in the summer as you do in the winter? Probably not. I’m sure you don’t wear extra coats and jackets out in the summer heat like you would in December. You have caution for your torso and you find ways to beat the heat whether it means wearing a polo, or maybe even a short sleeve shirt and tie. But, why don’t you do the same for your feet?

See? It’s bizarre. You keep your little tootsies wrapped in leather-bound sweatshops while the rest of your body is getting with the AC and a July breeze. Doesn’t seem fair to me.

But, it’s not your fault. This is all the doing of “Big Loafer.” That’s right. You can look it up. Do you think these leather shoe companies want you to put their products on the shelf for 25-50% of the year therefore greatly extending the amount of time you can wear them between purchases? I think not.

Here’s where it gets sickening. “Big Loafer” partnered up with the mainstream (more like lamestream) media to project this image to the general public. By only showcasing funeral professionals with fully covered feet, they produced implicit biases in the hearts of the public against us #freefooters that just won’t buy into the scam.

So, I am asking you to join me in this fight. Let’s take down the shoe corporations together by wearing loafer alternatives such as sandals, slides, and flip-flops- you know, footwear designed for this season.

The man won’t keep us down!

Comic of the Week

Same carpet. Same wallpaper. New TV. BIG renovation.

You Otter Be Proud

Let’s be honest, our profession gets a lot of negative press, so we’ve searched the internet to find stories of funeral things getting respect, and doing great things!

1) The 50 Oldest Funeral Homes in the U.S.
2) 10 Saturday Night Live Funeral Sketches Ranked Best to Worst