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Home Community & Culture

Funeral Director Brags | FFFW 157

Eli Gable by Eli Gable
July 29, 2025
in Community & Culture, Lighter Side
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DISCLAIMER: None of the F’s in FFFW stand for “facts.” Enjoy the satire.

I guess it’s worth mentioning that this has been a heavy week all around the globe. The FFFW was designed as a weekly article that doesn’t ignore the evils of this world but heavily focuses on all things good and goofy. So, that’s what we’re going to keep on doing. No matter how crazy this world gets, we want you to know you can rely on the FFFW to continue sharing GIFs and all things off-kilter.

Let’s dive in!


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FUNERAL BRAGS

Need to “big-dog” your colleagues? Try a few of these.

– I’ve been called the ‘King of Condolences’ for my heartfelt messages.

– I’ve had funeral services attended by more people than the local county fair.

– I’ve had mourners say my funeral processions are like parades for the afterlife.

– I once had a deceased client give a thumbs-up in their casket at the end of the service, and I swear it wasn’t just a twitch!

– My playlists are so good that mourners leave asking for a copy.

– I’ve been told my sympathy cards are collectors’ items.

– I’ve had families create a standing ovation at the end of the service.

– At my funerals, even the rain starts to cry on cue.

– I’ve been featured in more obituaries than anyone else in town.


GIF Of The Week


You Otter Be Proud

  1. Travel Plan by Inman Shipping Announces Partnership with Pekin Insurance
  2. Daughters of the American Revolution work to restore historic Chester cemetery
  3. Wichita funeral home’s therapy dog comforts in a way no human can
Eli Gable
Eli Gable

Contributor covering funeral profession news, technology and the changing business of deathcare.

All posts by Eli Gable

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