Party Dudes & Legal Language | 4M #245
Welcome to the two-hundred-and-forty-fifth edition of Morticians’ Monday Morning Mashup, 4M #245, where we’ll serve up bite-sized, easily-digestible nuggets of the deathcare news you need to crush conversations in the week ahead. Bon appetit!
Continuing clarity
Two years after Colorado lawmakers kicked off a massive overhaul of its previously-super-lax deathcare regulations, they’re still not done — and that’s a good thing for everyone. The latest legislation, signed by Gov. Jared Polis on June 6, restores the public’s access to funeral home inspection reports, which was quietly withdrawn in 2024. The law also increases penalties for abuse of a corpse convictions.
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Words actually do matter
The headline I’m about to share was probably crafted to increase curiosity — and therefore clicks — but I personally think it’s careless and extremely misleading journalism. In an article about the upcoming Leo DiCaprio/Eli Roth “Death Boom” doc, the site comingsoon.net chose the headline “‘The Answer Already Exists’: Death Boom’s Eli Roth & Jessica Chandler on Why Water Cremation Is Illegal” (italics are mine). As we all know, water cremation, or alkaline hydrolysis, is not illegal in every country or state; in fact, it’s legal, available, and growing in popularity in at least 29 U.S. states and five Canadian provinces. If clickers get past the headline and actually read the article, Roth and Chandler are actually pro-AH, but Roth is still quoted as saying, “Even if you want to do water cremation, which is 100% zero-emissions and doesn’t commingle ashes, you’re not allowed to do it. It’s illegal because they say, ‘Well, you can’t dump the water.’ Yet all of the blood and chemicals pumped through your body during embalming go right down the drain with zero filtration and into the oceans. It’s wild.”
Turtle Power!
Titan Caskets’ latest lineup in their ever-growing catalog pays homage to none other than those heroes-in-a-half-shell, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Cowabunga, dude!




