Funeral Executors: Your Biggest Questions, Answered
What’s the role of a “funeral executor?”
More and more frequently, people are appointing “funeral executors” – sometimes also called “funeral agents” – in the role of seeing that the wishes of the deceased about the funeral and disposition are carried out.
It’s a highly specific job: A funeral executor does not fulfill the same role as an executor of an estate. The similarity of the terms makes it easy to confuse the two, but the funeral executor’s role is limited specifically to funeral arrangements and method of disposition. Just about anyone can be named a funeral executor.
There are many questions about their purpose: What exactly do funeral executors do? Is this a legal appointment? Can it be challenged?
We’ll tackle these questions one by one.
Q: Why a funeral executor?
A: Those with concerns about whether their legal next of kin would carry out their wishes as intended after death can achieve greater peace of mind by hand-selecting the individual(s) they entrust to carry out their wishes after death.
The consideration is a popular one, especially in the LGBTQ+ community, where surviving family may not respect the life choices of the deceased, not infrequently to the point of estrangement. In such cases, an appointed funeral executor/agent alone has the legal responsibility to make decisions on behalf of the deceased, according to their preference.
Q: What specifically are a funeral director’s responsibilities?
A: The funeral executor handles all of the details of the funeral and disposition. Responsibilities include fulfilling the wishes of the deceased for final disposition method, funeral details, religious services and rites, and possibly the obituary. They do not extend to matters of distribution of the estate or financial concerns (the purview of the [general] executor of the will).
In addition to a funeral executor, according to the Funeral Matters website, there are several different roles and responsibilities which may be called upon in the event of a person’s death, each one with its own specific purpose in handling the affairs of the deceased. Included are executors, guardians, and those holding powers of attorney of various designations; add to these, now, the funeral director/agent.
Q: Is this a legal appointment?
A: Yes, and the person designated should be written into the will as selected for filling this role.
Consult an attorney. The person you appoint should be added to your legal will using language like the following (keeping in mind that details vary from state to state, here is an EXAMPLE of the language used to assign a funeral agent in New Jersey):
“I hereby nominate, constitute and appoint [insert name] to serve as my Funeral and Disposition Representative, pursuant to P.L. 2003, c. 261. My Representative shall have the authority and power to control the arrangements for my funeral and the disposition of my remains. My Executor shall notify my Representative of this appointment, and shall advise my Representative of the financial means available to carry out the Funeral and Disposition arrangements. In the event [insert name] should predecease me or for some other reason not qualify to serve as my Funeral and Disposition Representative, then I nominate, constitute and appoint [insert name of alternate] as my Funeral and Disposition Representative.” (source).
Q: Is this a legally binding role?
A: A funeral executor, or funeral agent, can certainly refuse the appointment. If they do, a backup (if selected by the deceased) will likely replace the originally-named executor. Responsibility thereafter would likely fall to the next of kin according to laws of the state.
Q: Can an appointed funeral executor be challenged by next of kin?
A: Probably not if it’s written into a legal will; one more reason it’s a good idea to know how the law applies to each case. As always, the final statement on the matter should come from a knowledgeable attorney in the appropriate state.
Having someone (forewarned, hopefully!) in such a role ahead of time seems a highly-practical anticipation, as the practice certainly could streamline the process for all affected. In the context of pre-need, it may be valuable to mention appointing a funeral executor or agent, offing the knowledge of the option as another element of service with the goal of taking some of the stress off of families to make a demanding time a bit less confusing, and a bit more efficient.
