Welcome to the two-hundred-and-twenty-eighth edition of Morticians’ Monday Morning Mashup, 4M #228, where we’ll serve up bite-sized, easily-digestible nuggets of the deathcare news you need to crush conversations in the week ahead. Bon appetit!
Hallford sentenced
Finally, at least one chapter in the sordid saga of Penrose, Colorado’s Return to Nature Funeral Home is closing. Last Friday, a Colorado judge sentenced Jon Hallford, co-owner of the facility where nearly 200 decomposing bodies were discovered in October 2023, to 40 years in state prison. He was previously sentenced to 20 years in federal prison for the fraud portion of his crimes. His wife and business partner, Carie Hallford, has yet to be sentenced by either court, but faces similar multi-decade sentences. Family members of the deceased were present at the sentencing, and urged the judge to enforce the maximum sentence of 50 years, calling Hallford “vile” and “monster” for his heinous crimes.
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Is it … free speech?
A Colorado family is fighting a cemetery’s order to remove a headstone that has displayed “inappropriate” images — two middle fingers — for almost five years. And they are NOT happy about it. The sisters of the two brothers buried in the plot argue that the carved symbols speak “to the character” of their entire family and they’re refusing to remove the stone. The cemetery says that now that they’ve received a complaint, they must address it, as the monument is “profane or offensive to the general public.”
It’s heeeere
The long-awaited movie version of the hit video game “The Mortuary Assistant” hit theaters on Friday. If you’ll recall, the game received rave reviews for its “creepy blend of psychological and supernatural horror with the meticulous embalming procedures,” and it seems the film is no less impressive. Check out the trailer (and perhaps the authenticity of said procedures) here:
He’s in trouble
A former employee of a German funeral home faces all sorts of charges after illegally removing dental gold, jewelry, and other items from more than 250 bodies over 11 years and selling it all for nearly $300k. His wife, who acted as a lookout, and his sketchy jeweler friend who bought the stolen items are also facing charges.
