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This Guy Completely Ruined an Entire Funeral Procession

March 27, 2014
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This Guy Completely Ruined an Entire Funeral Procession

Have you ever searched the word ‘funeral’ on Reddit? It returns over 35,000+ results. If you’re unfamiliar with Reddit, it is considered ‘the homepage of the internet’.

Reddit, is a social news and entertainment website where registered users submit content in the form of either a link or a text post.

We are constantly browsing Reddit for popular content themed around ‘funeral’ topics. The below post we found got us thinking about the situation the user found himself in and if this is a common occurrence.

The following post was made in a subreddit called ‘TIFU – Today I ****** Up’ – users submit a short story about their royal screw up and readers vote it up or down. This was voted as a complete screw up!

Read below to see how this guy accidental lead a funeral procession through his neighborhood and into his driveway. (Disclaimer: explicit language)

I work a few miles away from where I live so I usually go home for lunch. I’ve saved tons of money, I get some time to myself, and generally it’s just an enjoyable hour. I was in a pretty good mood today and when I’m in good mood I love to have jam sessions in my car. Today was the Foo Fighters. I’m cruising down the road, blasting some tunes, paying attention to where I’m going but not much else. There is a somewhat dangerous turn that I have to make to go home. It’s a stop sign about 100 feet away from a pretty curvy turn through some thick tree/bush/overgrowth stuff. Basically you look both ways and get to scootin’ and hope for the best.

I looked to my left, didn’t see anyone, took that as my cue and made a right hand turn. I’m having a great time with the radio cranked up, anticipating some delicious sandwich that I wanted to make, and that’s when I realized what was going on.

I caught up to a car in front of me and started noticing that there were a bunch of cars in front of that one…all with little flags on them. Oh, shit. It’s a funeral procession. “Well at least I’m a the back of it! I’ll slow down, give them some space out of respect and I’ll be on my way.”

For about a minute or two everything seemed fine. The funeral procession took a turn down a different road, and I continued on my way…then I noticed there were cars behind me. A lot of cars behind me.

I don’t know how it happened because I always thought that funeral processions drove pretty tight together. I thought cops were always hanging out with these things, but I didn’t see any. I’m not sure if it was the curvy road, a stop light, or what…but the damn thing got split in half…and I was in the middle! AND I AM LEADING IT NOW!

I have a flag on my car. It’s an Ohio State antenna flag (Go Bucks!) and I love it, but today it fucked me over.Looks kind of like this one. It was close enough in color to the maroon/red/some-color-that-I’m-sure-has-a-name that the others had on their flags I suppose, and maybe people got confused, because that whole line of cars was following me.

I turned into my neighborhood, and so did they.

I turned onto my street, and so did my following. I was leading these people off track and there was nothing I could do about it. I was the shepherd and they were my sheep. Poor sheep.

I’ll be honest guys, I took the cowards way out. I really did. I opened my garage door when I was a house away, pulled into my garage, and closed the door. The line of cars was basically stopped in front of my house. They eventually drove off, aimlessly wandering, looking for the rest of their herd.

I ate my sandwich is silence. It was a pretty fucking delicious sandwich – sourdough, turkey, avocado, cheddar cheese, hot sauce and some Doritos for that extra crunch – but I’m sure it would have been even better had I not ruined that damn procession.

I feel like shit about it.

Has this ever happen to a funeral procession you were leading?