Boston Herald Article Disses Funeral Directors…Absurd

November 8, 2010
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imageThe writer of the following Boston Herald article total puts a black eye on funeral directors and in my opinion is way out of line. I have never talked to a funeral director who “sells” or tries to “sell” a family anything. Presenting options to a family is not selling. I would love to read your comments on the following article:

Most of us have been there.

Grandma dies, or dear old dad. Everybody?s at the funeral home. Some oily guy with soft hands shows you the solid walnut casket for $4,000 and the gold-trimmed version for $5,500. Then there?s the funeral burial vault (the what?) for another $1,000. ?It protects the body from the, uh, well, uh,? says oily guy in faked solemn tones, ?the, uh, organisms and uh, decomposition.?

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?Look at this cheap swindler,? you?re thinking. ?But we can?t scrimp on grandma,? says keep-up-with-the-Joneses sister. Newly orphaned mom, meanwhile, is useless, just wailing away there in her funeral-home-special, hard-backed chair.

And before you know it, you?ve spent $10,000.

I?m here today to say: Snap out of it! End the madness, the over-spending, born of guilty siblings and grandkids trying to prove ?I loved her more!? Remember: you can spend $100,000 to make up for all those times you should?ve called. Too late. Grandma?s still dead.

I?m here today to say thanks to my generation, baby boomers fast approaching 6-feet-under ourselves. At last somebody?s made funerals-on-the-cheap more acceptable. We don?t call them cheap, of course. No, we talk about simpler, more meaningful funerals: the green funeral, the biodegradable eco-funeral, the closer-to-our-ancestors funeral, back when we shoved each other in pine boxes plopped into dirt that we very quickly became one with.

Why not the Wal-Mart or Costco cut-rate casket? (Be sure they guarantee on-time delivery.) Why not the pine box starting at $300? Or even the biodegradable cardboard (it?s sturdy enough) at $80 and up? Why get a funeral limo when your brother-in-law can fit the whole clan inside his new Ford Expedition?

Why not cremate? It?s affordable (less than $1,000) and eco-conscious.

I love the people up at Grace Church in Dover, an alternative Catholic Church where women are first-class citizens and the divorced and remarried take communion without fear. They?re building a memorial garden with roses and fountains where cremated remains will be placed inside individual compartments of a 6-foot wall and marked with plaques. So instead of driving hundreds of miles to visit grandma?s $5,000 casket inside its $1,000 vault at the $2,000 burial plot, plus maintenance, you can pop out of Sunday Mass, with the kids, and grandma?s right there.

With the thousands you save, the whole family can take a five-star, In Memory of Grandma Cruise, and toast her every single night. She?d be thrilled.

Source: BostonHerald.com

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